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IL family lawyerWhen a couple chooses to divorce through mediation, they work with a neutral third party to develop their divorce settlement. Usually, mediation is a less expensive, less stressful option than divorce in the courtroom.

Mediation only works when a couple is capable of working amicably together. Sometimes, couples who initially think they can mediate their divorce successfully find that it is a much different process than they envisioned. If you face challenges with your mediation, take the following steps to determine your best course of action:

Talk to Your Spouse About Your Issues to Work Them Out

Address your difficulties with your spouse directly. If you feel he or she is not taking the mediation process as seriously as you are or that he or she is not being cooperative, talk about it. Successful mediation is only possible when both partners are willing to communicate and cooperate. Your spouse might not realize he or she is being difficult or stalling the mediation process, or he or she might be unwilling to move forward and actively trying to sabotage it.

The issue could also be with you and your approach to mediation. The only way to determine whether it is worthwhile to continue pursuing mediation is to determine whether you and your spouse are both 100 percent on board with it. If not, mediation is not for you.

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Illinois divorce attorney, Illinois mediation attorneyCouples looking for a smooth, amicable divorce solution often turn to mediation to settle their differences and come to agreement on lifestyle arrangements following the end of their marriage. While it is true many divorces can take a turn and become messy, the bulk of them actually result in a peaceful, mutual split. It is not uncommon for this kind of separation to stem from a thorough, professional mediation process.

Why Do Amicable Divorces Benefit from Mediation?

Respect: Although mediation is typically pursued by couples who struggle with conflict resolution, those experiencing amicable divorces greatly benefit from the mediation process as well due to one simple factor: Both spouses are interacting in a civil manner. Couples who are already cooperating with one another and communicating peacefully are on the fast track to success when they enter mediation. The trained mediator can more effectively do their job to facilitate settlements and manage negotiations when both parties leave hostility and conflict at the door. If your divorce is mutual and you and your spouse are communicating with respect and patience, your meditation experience can be a positive, productive one.

Resolution timelines: The Illinois State Department of Human Rights reports that their Mediation Unit boasts a resolution rate of over 80 percent out of all conferences held. Mediation is proven to be a quick, efficient, and affordable process for divorcing couples. It is an especially fast process when you and your spouse enter mediation on amicable terms. The more common ground you share and the more civil you are, the faster you will reach an agreement and resolve your divorce case.

Similar expectations: Chances are, if you are entering mediation on civil terms, you likely already share similar expectations in regards to what you are looking to achieve and what you are looking to walk away with when the process is all said and done. Discussing goals and individual expectations before you begin the mediation process is a good way to increase your chances of success. If you want to resolve your conflicts quickly and relatively painlessly, consider making the effort to respect one another’s opinions, wants, and needs, and attempt to find a way to meet on middle ground.

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Illinios family law attorney, Illinois divorce lawyerDivorcing couples often hear a number of things about mediation as they enter the divorce process. Success stories and horror stories abound. More often than not, though, the success stories far outweigh the disappointing accounts given by co-workers, families, and friends. This is ultimately due to the overwhelming resolution rates that we see among Illinois State divorce cases. The Department of Human Rights reports that their Mediation Unit’s resolution rates are 80 percent for all conferences held. That tells us mediation works, and it can for you, too.

What Makes a Good Mediator?

Resolution rates are not magic, however. They do not exist by chance or luck; they are a direct result of working with a professional, efficient, trained mediator who is well skilled and equipped to produce good results. Here are three qualities that define a good mediator:

Effective Communication

All mediators are required to be excellent communicators. After all, it is their duty to help facilitate a civil, safe meeting between two divorcing partners to discuss and negotiate the terms of their separation. Listening skills are crucial, but being able to effectively communicate the concerns and needs of each spouse to everyone present during the meeting is a must.

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