Post-Divorce Life: Three Ways to Rebound Faster
For many couples who decide to end their marriage, the idea of bouncing back after the split is a daunting one. Regardless of how long you and your spouse were together or whether or not the divorce was a peaceful, mutual decision, saying goodbye to the relationship is an emotional journey that unfolds over time. Much like other losses in life, divorce brings about its own form of grief, which naturally slows down the rebound process.
Studies Show You May See an Improvement in Mental and Physical Health after You Leave a Poor Marriage
Although everyone needs time to work through the aftermath of the separation, moving on is not an impossible feat, as much as it may feel like it in the midst of the divorce process. A research study from the Journal of Family Psychology shows that those who have poor marriages generally do better after the divorce, and the overall satisfaction of individuals who divorce depends greatly on their perception of the relationship during the marriage. For example, if you and your spouse were fighting constantly and you experienced ongoing arguments and bouts of depression as a result, chances are you are going to benefit from the separation and all it entails.
Kick-Starting Your Goal to Move On
While you cannot force the healing period that follows divorce, you can be on your way to feeling better sooner, rather than later, by practicing the following:
1. Make yourself a priority - This is one of the most effective ways you can help put the divorce rebound effect into motion. Make time for yourself, even if you spend just fifteen minutes a day doing something you enjoy. If you love nature, get outside and take a walk in the park. If you love to read, pick up your favorite book and take a relaxing bath. If you work full time, have children to raise, and your free time is limited, find ways to listen to an audiobook in the car on the way to the office or allow the children to sleepover at a friend’s house once a week, so you can unwind and watch a movie. You can also cook yourself a nice meal; try a new recipe or make your favorite dish. You will be surprised by how much better you feel and how well you are able to cope with the stressors of divorce when you make yourself a priority.
2. Give up control - Much easier said than done, but a big part of getting the ball rolling on the recovery process is to recognize that you are not able to control everything that is happening around you. Even in the midst of financial struggles or new responsibilities that were born from the divorce, remember that you will not always have it all together, all the time. You will struggle and experience failure, but so does everyone else who goes through divorce. Remind yourself to yield to the struggles and tackle one thing at a time, instead of constantly fighting upstream.
3. Reconnect with your purpose - Along with making time to do things you enjoy, you can also give yourself a post-divorce boost by reconnecting with your passion and purpose in life. If you do not wish to change careers or are temporarily unable to go back to school, consider learning a new language on your own or take an online course on a subject that interests you. Somewhere along the way, you may discover a new passion or rekindle an existing one.
Divorce is never fun, but with attention to self-care and the right legal resources at your disposal, you can be on your way to protecting your rights, creating a smooth transition, and moving on with your life. Speak with a qualified Kane County divorce lawyer today to discuss your questions and concerns. Call Shaw Family Law, P.C at 630-584-5550 for a special consultation.