The Road to Divorce: Relationship Red Flags That Can Lead to Separation
No one likes to think about the possibility of an impending divorce, especially after spending months or years investing time and energy into a relationship. It is not uncommon for one spouse to feel blindsided by the news that their partner is considering divorce, or to experience shock that there is even a problem to begin with. The reality, though, is the road to divorce often begins long before the final weeks and months of the marriage. There are numerous red flags that can signal the potential end - or the beginning of the end - of a marriage, and it can be easy to dismiss these signs early on if you are not tuned into the root issues.
Paying Attention to the Warning Signs
Whether you are newly married and have been feeling uneasy about your recent partnership or you have been married for years and are beginning to question your marriage’s foundation, if you are sensing something is amiss, it is wise to pay attention to your instincts. Even if things seem to be running smoothly in the moment, those unsettling feelings are often an indicator that trouble is brewing. These warning signs can morph into much larger problems down the road if not acknowledged early on.
Common Red Flags
Distance - Most red flags that signal imminent divorce typically revolve around something that is lacking in the marriage. Distance is a perfect example of this factor. Whether your relationship is lacking physical or emotional intimacy or your spouse is simply not around to share the most basic day-to-day moments that contribute to a life together, any distance, especially when it is a recurring pattern, is a sign that something is wrong.
Lack of Equality - This is possibly one of the biggest reasons many marriages fail. Whether you put your job before your spouse, you compete with one another instead of supporting one another, or place unrealistic burdens on your partner in terms of financial earning, any lack of equality in any area of the relationship is a recipe for trouble. Successful marriages are built on foundations of equal partnership and mutual trust. If there is not a balanced sense of equality between both spouses from the get-go, this core issue can spill into other areas of the marriage and cause larger issues as time goes on.
Financial Disagreements - Not seeing eye-to-eye on how to handle your finances is one sign that you may be headed for trouble, but sheer indifference can be just as threatening as an actual disagreement. If your spouse shows no interest in your finances in general or does not seem to take them seriously while you are fully engaged in the planning and handling of your money, it is time to sit up and take note. It is important to share goals - even if you have different financial goals - and discuss them, so you are both on the same page. Financial arguments can be particularly corrosive on marriages when they involve overspending or purchases that were not discussed beforehand.
If you are discovering some of these warning signs within your marriage or have already decided that it is time to call it quits, speaking with a qualified Kane County divorce attorney can provide you with the guidance you need to move forward with the divorce process. Call Shaw Family Law, P.C. today at 630-584-5550 for a free consultation.