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Illinois divorce lawyerStatistically, an individual’s second or subsequent marriage is more likely to end in divorce than his or her first marriage. There are a few reasons for this. Although every marriage and by extension, every divorce, is unique, the same patterns and conflict sources tend to appear in second and later marriages across demographic groups.

It is not impossible to have a lasting second or subsequent marriage, but it does often take more work than a first marriage requires. Below are three common issues that drive remarried couples to divorce.

People Enter Second Marriages with More Baggage

Marriages end for a lot of reasons. A few common reasons include:

  • Poor conflict resolution skills;
  • Infidelity;
  • Poor communication skills;
  • Domestic violence;
  • Financial conflicts;
  • Conflicts about how to raise their children; and
  • Different lifestyle expectations.

Sometimes, a marriage ends primarily because of one partner’s behavior, like prioritizing his or her career over the family or behaving in a controlling manner toward his or her spouse. In other cases, a marriage breaks down because of actions on both partners’ parts. In any case, an individual who does not take the time to truly change his or her behaviors and thought patterns that led to the breakdown of his or her first marriage will likely repeat these patterns in a later marriage. This, coupled with a more dismal view of marriage and relationships that one can develop after a divorce, often spells trouble for second and subsequent marriages.

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Posted on in Divorce

Ililnios divorce lawyerCertain jobs and career paths are correlated with a higher rate of divorce than others. These are not necessarily the most physically stressful jobs like construction, nor are they jobs that tend to keep individuals away from home for prolonged periods of time, like the military. Many of the jobs cited as having a high divorce rate are jobs that are mentally exhausting and put employees into positions where they are in close physical contact with others, either clients or colleagues.

There are many factors that increase or decrease a couple’s likelihood of divorcing. Each partner’s career is only one of these factors. The couple’s education and income levels, whether they have children, how old they were when they married, and the income disparity between the partners are also indicators of whether a marriage will end in divorce.

Which Careers have the Highest Divorce Rates?

The following five careers are statistically the top five for divorces:

  • Dancers and choreographers;
  • Bartenders;
  • Massage therapists;
  • Gaming cage workers, the employees who handle financial transactions in casinos; and
  • Extruding machine operators, the workers who perform repetitive tasks on assembly lines.

Other careers linked to high divorce rates include professional athletes, switchboard operators, and individuals who work as nurses and home health aids.

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Posted on in Divorce

Illinois divorce lawyer, Illinois family law attorneyNo matter the circumstances, ending a marriage can be a heart-wrenching experience. Knowing when to call to quits is especially difficult, especially when you have invested a significant amount of time with your spouse. Some couples pull the plug at the first sign of serious trouble, while others may wait months, or even years, for the warning signs to appear. Even after those warning signs begin to surface, however, many couples have trouble letting go.

Knowing When Enough Is Enough

The key to deciphering if enough is enough begins with asking yourself if the bad has begun to outweigh the good in your marriage. This can be hard to figure out, especially when there is a plethora of good memories hidden between the clumps of bad times that continue to pile up. Ultimately, though, divorce experts believe one of the most glaring tell-tale signs that a marriage is in trouble is when the good times slowly become fewer and farther between. Taking it a step further, ask yourself if you have recently made any of the following observations about your marriage:

1. You can (and often do) envision life without your spouse - One big warning sign that your marriage is on the rocks is if you can clearly see, and often envision, what your life would look like if you were single, living without your spouse. Not only does it indicate that you are unhappy with your current relationship, it also highlights the fact that the intimacy you once shared with your spouse - including the sharing of feelings, thoughts, and desires - has dissipated. A lack in these areas naturally leads to distance, and distance is not necessarily always a good thing.

2. You feel your spouse has checked out - Many people who go through a divorce or are about to commonly report that they feel completely alone in the relationship, especially when it comes to whatever conflicts they are facing. If you feel an intense lack of support or feel your spouse has been absent in general, there is a good chance your marriage may be on the rocks. The old adage rings true: It takes two to make things work. If you are the only one working to solve the problems and repair your marriage, you may be fighting a losing battle.

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Posted on in Divorce

Illinois divorce attorney, Illinois family law attorneyThe American Psychological Association (APA) tells us that in the United States alone, more than 90 percent of people marry by the age of 50, but that 40 to 50 percent of couples end up divorcing. When it comes to subsequent marriages, the APA says the divorce rates are even higher, which tells us that although people continue to get married, certain troubles still tend to strain relationships and in many cases, inevitably cause marital demise.

Factors that Lead to Separation

While the causes for divorce are vast and diverse, there are certain trends in relationships that often result in separation, and ultimately, divorce. These trends all share common themes: Each one involves the breakdown of communication, intimacy, and trust. When combined, these factors turn into core conflicts and often result in the disintegration of a marriage. Among the many reasons for divorce, here are four of the most common:

1.Money management - Whether you have money troubles or not, the difference in how you and your spouse handle money can play a big role in your marital satisfaction. Many marriages end due to financial problems, and those problems do not necessarily always involve debt. For example, if you save a large portion of your income while your partner overspends, of if there is a significant difference in salaries, rifts can emerge that stem from tension and resentment.

2. Lack of contact - Physical intimacy, affection, and mere communication through texts and phone calls are all vital components to a successful, satisfying marriage. When there is a lack of intimacy, a decrease in basic expressions of affection, or no effort being made to reach out to one another, this lack of contact can erode the quality of the marriage over time. In some cases, it can cause the relationship to unravel quickly, depending on the other circumstances surrounding the problem.

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